August 5, 2010

Linkbacker U Is McLOVIN

Given Mike's lack of consistent Internet access this week, I've been handed the keys to this beautiful blue Porsche for a day. I'll try not to ding it up too badly...

Everybody Point and Laugh at PennLive

Michael Sedor of, a website better known for the numerous brain-dead idiots that lurk in its wasteland of a message board published a semi-readable article which asked a legitimate question: Who will be Week 6's starting quarterback? In true PennLOLive fashion though, Sedor ended up getting an opinion from some random message board user named "bowdenfan22" and it blew up in his face:

In my opinion, if Newsome is a bust this pre-season, Matt McLovin (sp?) stands the best chance to step in short term.

Matt McLovin prepares for a hot night on the town

No doubt, this is the most creative misspelling of a player's name we've seen in quite a while. We'd also like to know what the hell Sedor was thinking and why he couldn't get someone with a more legit user name to provide an answer..or at the very least, someone who can come close to correctly spelling Matt McGloin's name.

House Of Pain (Not Of The "Jump Around" Variety) is currently in the midst of doing a series titled House Of Pain, where they're examining the 50 most painful outcomes in college football history. Thus far, Penn State has been featured twice, both times on the winning end of things: The 1969 Orange Bowl victory against Kansas, where KU thought they had thwarted a game-winning two-point conversion attempt, only to find out they cheated by using a 12th man and subsequently failed to stop PSU on the do-over, and the 1983 Sugar Bowl against Georgia which I'm sure most of you are familiar with. If's a little visual aid for you:

The Sliz: Further Pussifying The Collegiate Drinking Experience

According to the Daily Collegian, recent PSU engineering grads have invented a new device called the "Sliz" whose purpose is to duplicate the experience of taking shots while eliminating the cringe in between reaching for the chaser. Needless to say, a decent-sized part of me died inside after reading about this as I began to envision scores of tailgaters drinking from these god-forsaken things. For those of you who are unfamiliar, here's how a Sliz works (video via

Let me just make one thing clear to all of you men reading this: If you start doing your shots from one of these things, then you might as well go ahead and buy yourself some vagisil, get a tattoo on your lower back, and walk around with a purse because this is a girly device and drinking from this is no different than drinking strawberry daiquiris or cosmos. You want to drink liquor and not cringe? Have a fucking mixed drink. Otherwise, cringe like a man and reach for that chaser.

And In Other News...

Notre Dame and Texas are thisclose to finalizing a four-game home-and-home series

USC held their first practice under Lane Kiffin and it was just a little bit more sparse than usual.

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  1. I like your style, sir. One non-sliz cocktail to you.

  2. Glad to see at least one dude shares my thoughts...Cheers.

  3. What the hell is this chaser that you speak of? Just grab a Jagermeister like the rest of the big dogs on the porch.